Snow Day!

I just felt like blogging again. I don't know if anyone reads this. Sometimes I hope people read it, sometimes I don't; I just feel like blogging. : )

My sisters both got to stay home, because it iced all night last night. It makes it feel like a snow day for me. I haven't started my job yet, so I'm home!

The only bummer is that my sister's choir performance was tonight, and I usually help prayer lead at Gateway House of Prayer (www.ghopstl.com) on Monday nights, but I scheduled off, and I wanted to go to her thingy! Oh well.

I am so excited that Stacia is coming home from College on Wednesday! I also start working at St. Louis Bread Co. on Wednesday (so excited!). So, Wednesday is a good day. I don't want to get too preoccupied with the future, though (Matthew 6:34). Today is a good day, too!

home in mo and God's provision

I'm back in Missouri!

I've been here since "break," when I graduated. It's been a great time of relaxation, hanging with my family, etc. I've also still felt significantly connected to Boston, but I know that God has me here, and I feel at peace being here. After a while of this nice relaxation, I felt the Holy Spirit quote a scripture verse to me: "If you don't work, you don't eat." haha

I was going to get a job, but I realized that it was more than that... it was a spiritual principle in God's economy. He set a law that says, it's only right to work if you're going to eat. I also have been catching up on my reading, and that same day, I started the next book I wanted to read, which was "Keys to Heaven's Economy: an Angelic Visitation with The Minister of Finance," which is a great book by Shawn Boltz. It definitely talked about God's economy and how He wants to give us things, not for our gain, but to use for His kingdom and to bring Him glory, etc, etc... well, so much more than that. It's not a "prosperity gospel" to be fat and happy Christians, but just that everything that we have comes from God, and God has keys to give us what He wants us to have that will help us get to our destiny. Also, I was listening to different messages from ministers online. Both of the messages that I listened to that day were just the next ones in line -- I had listened to the ones before them -- but they both had to do with God releasing His Kingdom finances and resources. I thought, "Hmm, God is really speaking to me about this." DUH!

Then, I went to my homegroup that I've gone to on and off during college, when I've been home, and they said that they were about to start a study on finances. I told Tim, one of the leaders, that he didn't know that the reason that he was doing it was because I had just come back to their homegroup (half jokingly).

OK, so God is speaking to me about this. So what? So, I needed a car to get to a job. I didn't really think too much about it, because, honestly, I didn't have the money. However, I had been praying about it on and off. And I told God, "God, you get me whatever car You think I should have, and I'll use it for you."

Well, that week, I was talking to Brooke, one of the girls in our house church. She was asking me if I needed a car, and if I was going to buy one. I told her that I needed one, but I wasn't sure how I would buy one. The next day, her grandma, who doesn't have a lot of money, gave me her old car. She had just bought a mini-van. It's a '93 gold Ford Taurus. I love it! Praise the Lord!

I knew that I needed to get a job, so I was seriously praying about that. My mom started praying that I wouldn't have to go looking for one, but one would basically fall into my lap. I thought, "that's a good prayer," (lol) so I started praying it.

A few days later, I had a call from the place I used to work, asking if I needed a job. Turns out that an HR person who didn't even know me was searching through employee records and thought, "I wonder what she's doing?." What a mighty God we serve! I told her that I was applying to a summer research program in Paris, and I wouldn't find out if I got in until February, so I might only be able to take a temporary position. She said, "That's fine; we have temporary openings!" Amen!

I'm just waiting for all that paperwork and what-have-you's to go through and for them to call me back.

Well, that catches me up a little bit...

more later....

how i got here

hey everybody. so, for those of you who don't know and would like to know, here is how it all started.

...believing in God, that is.

When I was 9, I was in Bible quiz. That's this competition in Assemblies of God, where kids memorize a bunch of answers to Bible questions. If the answer is a scripture, you have to answer "word-for-word" in whichever version you memorize (we of course only had KJV, because that was the "real" Bible), meaning, yes, ands, ifs, and buts ("and the trump shall sound, and the dead in Christ shall rise first..." -- as robotically and fast as possible).

my parents were both hard-core Christians all of my life, but I started wondering, "how do I know this is real?" I know, not what typical 9-year-olds think about, but I really wanted to know. I read all sorts of adult books anyways, so I was there, intellectually, in a way.

So, I started digging around. I really wanted to believe that God was real, so I would look for evidences ("People thought this city they listed in the old testement didn't exist, but they just found the remains." "oooh, cool.")

One time in particular, it really hit me, though. I lived in the country, and I was going out at night to feed the animals. I looked at the stars, and they looked so bright. I thought, "I really want to believe God is real, but I just don't see any evidence." I wanted to see something up there in the stars that would prove "God made these."

I went inside, thinking that I would ask my mom, she would tell me, and then I would feel better.

So, I confidently ran inside and said, "Mom, can you prove me to me that God is real, that the Bible is real?" She suddenly got really serious, and said, "No. I can't prove it to you. You have to ask God to show Himself to you. Lyssa, you have to ask Him. Lyss, you have to ask Him. Do it, Alyssa. Alyssa, you HAVE to do it."

"Ok, ok, mom. I will."

I felt really serious and sad. I mean, if God wasn't real, I didn't know what I was going to do. I felt really alone, too. My mom couldn't tell me. I had to ask God. Seriously, it was a scary thing. I'm sure it was scary for her, too, to tell me that, but I'm so glad she did. God wants us to seek Him. [see seeking God at the end]

I remember laying on my bed and looking at my ceiling. I was so serious. I didn't know what I was going to do if God wasn't real, but I wasn't sure. I think God can tell when we're testing Him, but I wasn't. With my whole heart I said,

"God, if You're real, please show Yourself to me. Please, God."

..and fell asleep.

Immediately [dream or vision, I don't know], I was in this dark room, and I saw Jesus sitting there. It felt like I only saw Him for a split second, but His face was so, so real to me. If you asked me to draw Him, I couldn't really (I never was much of a drawer, anyways, and scripture says that He was unremarkable to look at). I just know that the thing that really stood out to me were His eyes. They were brown, of course. His face and his eyes made me sadder to look at than anything I've ever seen in my life. I mean, they were so full of sorrow and love. I couldn't handle it. I really couldn't handle looking at His face. It was so sad. I knew it was because of sin, could feel the weight of my sin [and I was only 9 -- it was just the pride inside of me, the inability to obey, the inability to forgive, the sin]. I fell as on my knees, and I was so broken inside. I was sobbing. It really, really broke me like nothing I've ever experienced. I was saying,

"I'm so sorry, God, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, God."

And I felt and saw [with colored letters] a voice, the voice of the Father I guess, saying,

"It's ok. I love you."

That made me cry harder [you know when you really hurt someone, and then they say that to you? it makes you cry]. and I kept saying, "God, I'm so sorry." And He kept saying,

"It's ok. I love you."

I finally woke up, and I was crying so hard. It took my parents 45 minutes to get out of me what happened. I kept choking out, between sobs, "He was so sad," "But He loves us so much," and "but it's our sin," over and over. My parents were really concerned until they finally got it out of me.

After that, I knew Jesus was real. I knew that the Bible was real. I would try to tell my friends about it, but after a while, I would lose perspective again. God's grown me in Him, though, and He's been faithful to show me more of Himself and confirm His word over and over and over [and over and over and over ...].

There were other cool things that happened. I mean, it was neat when I was baptized in the Holy Spirit and got tongues. It was cool the first time that I laid hands on someone and they were healed [really cool], and when I was able to prophesy and know things about people they hadn't told me... but really, my encounter with Jesus was the one thing that was the most important, pivitol moment of my life. If God hadn't shown me anything else all my life, it would have been enough. It's neat if you don't have to see that to believe. God rewards that. I really, honestly did need it, though, to think that God was real. I needed it.

I hope this blessed someone... or you at least now can understand me a little better, I think.

LOVE!

1 Corinthians 13

 1If I speak in the tongues^[a] of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,^[b] but have not love, I gain nothing.

 4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

 8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

 13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Seeking God

God wants us to seek after Him. I don't know why that is. Why did Jesus speak in parables. Why does God want us to seek Him? I don't know. But He does promise that He will be found by us, if we seek.

**EDIT**

Actually, there are some reasons why God wants us to seek Him. Faith is the only thing that pleases Him (Hebrews 11:6 -- Without faith, it is impossible to please God, because those who come to him must believe that he exists, and that he is the rewarder of those who diligently seek him). The way is narrow. God wants us to desire Him. He is the ultimate lover. What lover doesn't want to be loved? We were made to love God, to pursue God. God is the ultimate pursuer. He pursued us to death on the cross. He wants us to pursue. He is teaching us. How else are we going to overcome? If we don't have enough perseverance to chase after him, how are we going to take up our cross and escape from the things of the world that desperately cling to us?

Right now you may be thinking, "That's great! He shows Himself to Alyssa. How come nobody told this to me before? Is God a respector of persons?" And I would say that He is not. The reason you are reading this, if you have never heard this before, and this is popping out to you, is to give you the thought to seek Him. Don't push it away. The things of life could grip your soul, but Jesus is so much better. So, so, so much better. Giving it all to Him is so sweet.

***END EDIT***

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for wholeness and not for evil, ^xto give you a future and a hope. ^{12 y}Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. ^{13 z}You will seek me and find me. When you seek me ^awith all your heart, ¹⁴ I will be found by you, declares the Lord

If you are like I was, I coucil you to ask God to show Himself to you. I just want to help you, if you're in the same place I was. It's ok to just ask. God doesn't do the same thing to all of us, so it [pretty much guaranteed] won't be the same, but it will be real. I mean, what have you to lose? I was really glad I did...

healing room updates....

now for some more exciting adventures.

here are a few of the stories:

-------------------------------------------------------

Ying-ying:

She came to the healing room three weeks ago. She had screws screwed into her mouth to help move her jaw. She had these terrible sores that plagued her day and night.

We prayed for her, and as I prayed for her, we asked her if she wanted prayer for anything inside, and she did. We prayed for that and got a couple of pictures and prophetic words for her.

we prayed for her sores, and she said they seemed a little better, but they weren't healed. We were having faith as much as we could, though, and really praying fervently. She told us that she felt really liberated inside. She told me that when I layed my hand on her head to pray, she felt the healing power of God coming out of my hand, and she felt a pressure on her jaw (I didn't touch that at all). So, I kept praying.

The next few days, we heard discouraging reports... her sores were not getting better. However, her spirit was really lifted. i kept praying.

about a week later, she went into the dentist. the dentist told her that she could have the screws removed -- that they didn't expect this to happen so quickly, but that she could have them removed.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Joe:

Harry was walking up the stairs going to the healing room, when he noticed Joe coming up the stairs on crutches. Harry said, "I see that your leg is obviously broken, and I'm going to a healing room. Do you want to come?"

Joe said, "Sure."

I was standing in the kitchen. it had been such a taxing week for me, and I'm usually in prayer during the healing room, but during our first broken bone person off the street who knew none of us, i was heating up hot chocolate.

Harry comes in and says, "Joe has a test to study for, so we have to do this quickly."

we were like, "ok..."

So, Joe came over, and we prayed over him... not in a really loud way, but in a sincere way, using the name of Jesus and just telling him that God loves us and wants to heal us. We also prayed for his test [he did great, by the way], and I prayed a blessing over his life. ... and kept praying

i saw him after a few days in the street. i asked him when the next time he woudl see a doctor was. he said he would see his physical therepist [for the first time since we prayed for him] the next day. i kept praying that God would completely heal his leg (we didn't know if he'd been healed or not) let him have NO PAIN during physical therepy.

i've been continuing to pray (it's been a few weeks now)

yesterday, i finished reading Revelation out loud (do it, just do it. it's awesome), then i was playing my guitar and worhsipping, and i felt the Spirit (I haven't felt Him that much lately, just known He was there) and the presence of angels.... I felt God say, "I'm moving." I was really excited, cuz I've been praying for some stuff (including Joe). Yes! God is moving.

Harry called me and said, "Alyssa, I just talked to Joe. I asked him how his leg was. He said,

'Well, I haven't had any pain for a few weeks now..."

Harry said, "You should get lunch sometime with Alyssa and me."

pray for us guys, and God's work here.... that God would let me know what things to focus on in my short time here, and that He would continue the work that He started.

..and i'll keep praying.

_____________________________________________________________

well, in the life of me, life is passing quickly. i celebrated a minor victory this week by successfully completing two huge presentations (senior staff at Medtronic, where I'm working and doing senior project, and a presentation for my senior project with BU professors). that is over!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111111one

i'm getting really excited about this faith stuff.

it's weird when you pray for people, and it's just your faith (and the faith of your friends) and no one is more experienced, and it's up to you guys to bring God's presence, because no one else is. but then it gets exciting. i've learned several things about praying for people in the healing room:

1. God is more concerned about a person's inner self. Many times the injury or whatever will heal, but the scars inside remain. Every time I don't ask God what to pray for inside a person, they don't get healed physically right away. oops. He wants us set free of all the junk, rejection, unforgiveness, generational curses, everything that isn't completely whole in our soul (mind, will emotions -- soul does not equal spirit)

2. I really have to listen to the Holy Spirit and pray exactly as He said. If the Lord of the universe did not presume to always pray over people the same way, but listened to the Father, even putting clay and spit on someone's eyes, why do i think that God should let me pray however I want to?

3. Perseverance: "Therefore, ^yconfess your sins to one another and pray for one another, ^zthat you may be healed. ^aThe prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.^{2 17} Elijah was a man ^bwith a nature like ours, and ^che prayed fervently that it might not rain, and for ^dthree years and six months it did not rain on the earth. ^{18 e}Then he prayed again, and heaven gave rain, and the earth bore its fruit." ( James 5)

when Elijah prayed for it to rain, he knelt on the ground and prayed fervently for it to rain. Then he asked his disciple to look for rain. He sent him seven times, and in between seven times, he kept fervently praying, not losing hope. At the seventh time, the servant saw a cloud the size of a man's hand. then, he counted that as the Lord beginning to send the rain and prayed again, and it rained. I've been learning to persevere in prayer, and to take the little things as signs that God is working.

^{1 Kings 18:
41} And Elijah said to Ahab, “Go up, eat and drink, for there is a sound of the rushing of rain.” ⁴² So Ahab went up to eat and to drink. And Elijah went up to the top of Mount Carmel. ^kAnd he bowed himself down on the earth and put his face between his knees. ⁴³ And he said to his servant, “Go up now, look toward the sea.” And he went up and looked and said, “There is nothing.” And he said, “Go again,” seven times. ⁴⁴ And at the seventh time he said, “Behold, ^la little cloud like a man’s hand is rising from the sea.” And he said, “Go up, say to Ahab, ‘Prepare your chariot and go down, lest the rain stop you.’ ” ⁴⁵ And in a little while the heavens grew black with clouds and wind, and there was a great rain. And Ahab rode and went to ^mJezreel. ⁴⁶

fresh fire falling

it's been far too long since i posted.

you know like when you want to call someone so badly, but then you think, "oh, i want it to be a good conversation, and i really don't have an hour or more right now," and the more you put it off, the harder it is? yeah, it's like that. God keeps doing stuff.

the conference with Bill Lackie was amazing. [for those of you who don't know/would like to know i hosted this prophet coming to our area, it was a big deal, i had to find pastors to back it, a few did, we finally got favor for a building, it took lots of faith, boldness and obedience, etc, etc]. God really showed up and shook up. PRAYER WORKS. i had been fasting a praying consistently and often, and others were praying too. also, another thing that God likes is faith.

many, many were released into hearing God's voice. something i didn't expect: many were baptized with the Holy Spirit and FIRE, if you know what i mean. i mean that everyone who wanted a prayer language -- everyone -- got it. i mean that people came in there not knowing if they ever heard God's voice, and at the end of the day were speaking the word of the Lord for others.

... and the rumblings have just begun.

there was a whole group who came over from MIT, and they were all completely drenched with what God is doing. they continued to pursue more and pray after the conference. i am absolutely excited about what God is doing there.

a bunch of girls in my core group were released in all of this. it was so miraculous to see God do that. i mean, it's the stuff you dream about, in the Kingdom, but don't usually see.

God is moving so FAST.

the prophet spoke a word over me. it was really encouraging, but really challenging. the first things out of his mouth were,

"I hear the Lord pleading with you, and here is the plea: I don't hear the Lord pleading with you, because there's a problem, and you're saying 'no,' but because time is running out"

so pray for me.

For those of you who may not have heard of anything like this before and are still hanging with me, here is one little snippet of how God spoke. I have been asking the Lord, begging with the Lord, that I wouldn't follow my desires in my own heart anymore. My desires get me hurt and Him hurt. (See James 1) I only want His desires. Among many things, Bill Lackie said, "You've said to the Lord, I have so many desires in my heart. I don't want the desires in my heart, I only want Your desires"

that was only one thing that he said verbatim that I've said in my heart before. prophecy is real. also fortune telling is real... it just depends on the source. my source is the only safe one... and He loves everybody (besides the devil)

so, the last press is on.

pressing on.

to pass it on.

Lord, give us the fresh bread, please. amen.